Tips for Students on finding meaningful mentorship
1. Know What You’re Looking For
Before finding a mentor, you’ll want to think about what it is that you’re looking for in the relationship. Are you new to a company and want to know how to succeed within your role? Or maybe you are looking to make an internal transition and seeking advice on how to do so. Or perhaps, it’s about learning a new skill and hearing about how someone else got there. Regardless of the situation, it’s important to know what you’re seeking. Tony Conrad, founder of about.me says that understanding your goals and setting clear expectations is the #1 secret to finding a mentor. This will help you to narrow down who to talk to and network with, which will lead to finding mentor(s) that best align with your circumstances. Much of the confusion that emerges around finding a mentor relates to looking to the wrong person for advice. By taking the time to sit down and strategically think about what guidance you need, you’ll be better positioned to identify the right person.
2. Ask for What you Want
Research has shown that while men tend to actively seek mentors, women are less likely to engage in mentoring relationships unless they are sought out. This leads to less women having mentors, and therefore less women receiving the necessary guidance and advice to advance within their careers. I was recently talking with one of my mentors about an interest I have in an area unrelated to her work, and she encouraged me to set up career coaching calls with another woman who focuses on that area. Initially, I thought it would be awkward to ask. However, I went ahead and sent a message anyway explaining my desire to gain more experience in her area of expertise, and I asked if we could chat once a month about it. She readily agreed, and four months later, I look forward to those monthly conversations and would consider her to be one of the most impactful mentors in my network.
3. Pursue Multiple Mentors
While it’s important to look up to people as role models, you probably don’t want to mimic every single thing they’ve done. Rather, you want to take their experiences, draw insights from them, and use those to influence your own unique career path. What that in mind, there’s no single person who you can or should turn to for all mentorship matters – instead, you should seek the guidance of multiple women. I would say that I currently have 3 significant mentors at work, all of which provide me with guidance on different areas of my career. They vary in their past experiences and current roles, and it’s the combination of all three of their influences that provides me with direction in determining my own career goals. Personally, I’ve found that having more than one mentor has allowed me to draw different, yet equally valuable perspectives about my future in a way that substantially impacts my growth potential.
4. Don’t Be Afraid to Look Outside of Your Office
As touched on above, there are many different reasons you might be seeking a mentor. In some cases, it relates to your specific company or role, but other times you’re just looking for someone to talk to about your career in general. One of my most cherished mentors works in an entirely different industry than I do, and she lives across the country in another city. When we meet, it’s usually about my broad career goals - like my desire to get an MBA sometime down the line, or my dream of one day starting my own company. She brings an entirely different perspective than the mentors I work with can offer, which has been helpful with my bigger picture goal planning. Don’t let the four walls of an office limit your mentor pool.
If there’s not someone in your company who you think fits what you need, look elsewhere. And if you’re not finding someone within your network, there are a number of companies that are working to help women find and foster these relationships. The famous dating app that promotes women making the first move, Bumble, has expanded its services to include networking. Now, with Bumble Bizz, you can search for and discover women in your area to connect with about your career goals, and perhaps you’ll find that mentor you’ve been looking for. The app is completely free, so why not give it a shot? It’s time you make the first move!
5. Seek More Than Simply Mentorship
At a recent Women in M&A Summit that I attended, we learned about the difference between “mentors” and “sponsors.” The way it was explained is that mentors provide guidance and advice, whereas sponsors actively advocate for and promote you. Mentors might be the ones to help you to navigate a difficult situation or build up a skillset and tackle a challenge, while sponsors are the people who champion you and provide you with stretch assignments and advancement opportunities.
It’s expected that you may tell your mentors something you’re struggling with, but it’s advised to focus more on your accomplishments and how to further excel with your sponsors. While both are equally important, a 2010 Catalyst study showed that despite more women having more formal mentors than men, 15% more men won promotions. Why is this? Men had more sponsors. Knowing the difference between who your mentors and sponsors are is critical to your career trajectory.
When engaging in relationships with more senior-level colleagues within your company or industry, be sure to differentiate between the two and take advantage of the benefits of both types of relationships. And when you’re ready to move up, look to your sponsors to pound the table for you.
Finding a mentor isn’t easy, but it doesn’t have to be as hard as you may have made it out to be. Mentors are supposed to ease your worries, not elevate them. Don’t stress yourself out too much, but be thoughtful in your approach and be sure you know what you’re seeking. And once you’ve found the right person, be sure to keep in touch. There’s nothing worse than finding a great mentor, and then seeing the relationship fall flat due to lack of engagement. Good luck!Tips for Students on finding meaningful mentorship
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